Excitement. Anxiety. Joy. Nervous. Happy. Sad…
In the last few weeks, many people have asked how I am feeling in response to my next step in life. To be honest, it just depends on when you ask me. It depends on what I am thinking about. I am an emotional burrito!!!
Today is the last day in the office of GCTV. I have learned so much while working here that I will be forever indebted to Pastor Brian and the staff. In only a year and a half we have become a close team that has survived more than any church staff should. One day our story will be told, and when it is, most people will be blown away, while others won’t believe it. It has been the greatest test of leadership any of us will probably face, but in the end we are greater leaders for it. The staff at GCTV loves the people of this church more than the people understand, and that is something I want everyone to know. Never take for granted how much this staff loves you, and will be there if you need them.
Let’s lighten things up a bit…here are some things I have learned while I was here:
- Pastors Brian and Scott have weird tastes in football teams! But I will say this, they are loyal to their teams despite all the garbage they get for it.
- Kathy Stock’s voice reminds me of Norah Jones.
- Scotty Thornton is one of the most laid back guys I know. You gotta keep an eye on that guy…
- Robby Hughes is by far one of the funniest and most random guys I have ever met! I will always be the Commander though…
- Steve Mooney is really a Pirate at heart.
- Pastor Lance’s laugh makes me laugh. It’s one of the deepest laughs I have ever heard.
- Tabitha Hunter makes the best cupcakes on the planet. No discussion. And don’t give me one of those “Well, you should tastes my Aunt Betsie’s.” I won’t and I don’t want to! Put that in your cupcake pan…
- Jason Stock should join the UFC. Just sayin…
- I have not many people that generally love people as much as Lisa Collier. It’s inspiring.
- Marty Fitzpatrick is just a funny guy. And you really need to see his son breakdance!
- Jerad Collier is a music snob. “A Blues band and a Jazz band are not the same thing!!!!”
- Tiffany Mooney and Amber Tice are two of the most loyal and talented Kids Workers I have ever seen. Please don’t stop loving these kids, they need you.
- Tiffany Stuart, I think you have a Facebook addiction. I am starting a FB Anonymous group and you need to be there! But, kidding aside, you have also been very encouraging and Gracen will miss you terribly.
- Pastor Scott is one of the most talented guys I know. Is there really anything he can’t do?
- Pastor Brian has more shoes than most women I know. Just kidding…wait, no I am not! That dude has got some shoes!
- Piney and Michelle have been great friends since the day I pulled in the driveway of Tallahassee. I will miss you guys more than you know…
- Jeremy Williams is a gangsta in hiding. Don’t let the red hair fool ya. You will find that out if he texts you. Thanks for all the lunches, they are priceless.
- Ty and Jenn – You guys will be fine. Your marriage will rock!
- Did I mention that Tabitha Hunter makes amazing cupcakes?
Okay, let’s be honest. I am only moving a couple hours away so it not like we won’t see you again. I have made so many friendships, that the list could go on for a long time and no one would read it anyway. Maybe I’ll do a second one later…
I am a better person for having been here. I am a better leader, thinker, and can’t say how much I treasure my time here. Was it rough? At times, but the tough times shape us. Was it fun? Of course, that’s when good memories are made. Will I miss it? More than you will ever know. I am on a new journey, one that will be filled with great accomplishments as well as a few failures. But, I know that it is one that God has ordained, and that is all I really need to know.
Grace.
Ben
It was announced today at Genesischurch.tv that I would be leaving. Now before you flip out and go into detective mode to try and figure why I would leave such an amazing church I am just going to tell you so you can know. I am planting a brand new church in Panama City called Baypointe Church!!!!
For the past few months Pastor Brian Hunter and I have been talking about this and I feel this is the next step for me in my faith journey. The Florida Church of God State Office has approved me, and my family and I are taking some steps of faith to make this vision I have a reality. I am excited and a little nervous (okay, a lot nervous!) about this but know that I know this is a God moment in my life. Pastor Brian and Genesis will be partnering with me to plant this church. They will providing resources, equipment, coaching, as a way to be a major part of this church plant.
A couple of details I am sure you are wondering about. My last Sunday at Genesis will be October 4th. Brenda (through a huge miracle of God) has been transferred from her present job to her corporate office which is located in Panama City. She starts on October 12th so we will be moving the weekend of the 9th and 10th. (We need help moving! At least you will be getting an excuse to go to the beach for the weekend…) Our opening day for Baypointe will be April 4th 2010 which is Easter Sunday. Between now and then I will be forming a core group, training teams, and yes RAISING MONEY! It will take a lot of finances to make this dream a reality, but I believe that God will lead me to the right people and churches that will invest in a kingdom moment. Many of you reading this I believe are those friends that God will use to help financially and in prayer.
This is not a sad thing, this is a great thing! I will miss so many people at Genesischurch, but through our partnership with Genesis I will be in close touch with many of you. Please keep us in your prayers as I take on the daunting task of raising the necessary funds that will make the dream of a life-changing, Spirit filled, church in Panama City a reality.
http://blackeyedpeas.dipdive.com/media/76361
This is one of the most amazing videos I have ever seen…
Imagine what would happen if one person was willing to stand for Christ? Could it catch on like this?
You might not like The Black Eyed Peas, but I think you will get the point.
Last night I completed all my course work for my Doctorate of Ministry degree. My dissertation was successfully defended and all paperwork is complete. So it’s over and I really don’t know what to do with myself. This morning was the first time in 8 years that there were no text books in my bag. I don’t think it has sunk in yet. I have accomplished a task I sat out to do almost a decade ago, and now that it is done, it’s weird. Here are a couple of things I leaned along the way:
1. A lot of the work was tedious and definitely not exciting, but it through those courses I learned discipline.
2. A lot of the work will never be taught from the pulpit, but through it I learned how to discern the needs of those God has placed under me.
3. A lot of the work I thought would never get done, but through it I learned perseverance.
4. A lot of the work stretched me theologically, but through it I found that God places wisdom and learning in me when I need it most.
Please do not get me wrong, I learned plenty of academic material and when I made the statement to Pastor Brian that my brain is full of a lot of useless knowledge, he simply said “it’s not useless, it’s the foundation on how you now filter everything.” Good point.
I want to say thanks to my amazingly patient wife, Brenda. She has put up with 8 years of me and all the frustrations that went along with it. It’s over, baby! Also, I have to say thanks to my dad, who made it financially possible. I have no student loans due to his willingness to pay tuition. And finally to Dr. E Bob Kuschel and Pastor Brian Hunter for their willingness to put up with a full-time staff member that still held to a dream of higher education. Most “bosses” wouldn’t let that happen and you guys did, thanks.
Okay so now what?
1. I am going to read books that I want to read!! Lots of them No more being force fed books that I had no interest in…I AM STILL TRYING TO GET MY HANDS ON A KINDLE!! Keep your eyes and ears open for a used one all you Craiglisters and Ebayers…
2. I am going to sleep.
3. I am going to clear my muddy head.
After that I don’t know…but I know God does.
Everyone has a story. For most of us our story has made us who we are, and is shaping who we want to be. The stories of our lives are usually not that far off from each other, yet we live life dealing with issues alone. God never intended for us to do life, or for that matter suffer through it alone.
That is the purpose of our fall kickoff series at Genesischurch.tv called “I Am Human.” This will be a series like no other. You will hear people’s stories, see their pain, and hear their ways to victory. Real stories from real people. Please be there this week as we seek to bring freedom to people, encourage some, and introduce new people to the amazing love of Christ.
Okay, so I have a confession to make and I need help from all you online shoppers out there. Everytime I purchase something, someone always comes behind me and says “Hey, you could have saved a hundred dollars if you would have bought that at youareanidiotfornotbuyingithere.com!”
So I have decided that I want a Kindle or Kindle 2. I carry roughly 4-5 books with me at all time and my shoulders could use the break. I know I am a nerd for carrying around that many books, and yes I am reading all of them. I jump around between books depending on my mood.
So, how do I get my hands on one for cheap? How do I fulfill my dream of carrying only one thing in my bag (besides my MacBook Pro, of course!) I have never bought anything on eBay, but my wife is a Craigslist addict and I have already enlisted her help.
Please help me in my quest for more technology in my life!!!! Email me at ben@genesischurch.tv or just leave a comment here. Kindle Here I come…
All of us have to make them. There is no way you will get through life without having to deal with them. Sometimes you have no choice and you are left to deal with the consequences of someone else’s. Sometimes they are easy, sometimes hard. They are DECISIONS.
As I deal with counseling people I find that often people that come to see me have made decisions, are looking for God’s guidance in decisions, or are dealing with the consequences of a bad decision. Our life is nothing more than a series of decisions we make added together to produce an equation that we call life. Sometimes they make sense and are easy, like, “Ben, do you like brussel sprouts?” The answer is easy, NOT AT ALL! I don’t have to think about it or even “pray” about it. Sometimes they are hard, and you have to deal with the good and bad of the choice. So what processes or things should you do before making a major decision? Here are a few things to consider:
1. Seek God. Sounds cliché coming from a pastor, but the truth is many times people do not try to find what God would have them do. They react to circumstances and are left to deal with the ramifications of their impulsiveness. He might not answer right away, but I believe Jesus said something about “keep knocking.”
2. Get counsel from someone you trust. I have a couple of people that all my decisions get filtered through. They are Godly, and they love me either way. They are not afraid to tell me the hard truth. Don’t surround yourself with people who only tickle your ears. People who love you tell you the hard stuff.
3. Think. Use your head. Engage your mind. Andy Stanley wrote a book called “The Best Question Ever,” in which he said that before you make any decision you should ask yourself “what’s the wise thing to do?” This is a critical question you should ponder and marinate on.
4. Go back and seek God again. You will never do this too much.
5. Finally, don’t hesitate. Once you have gone through a logical sequence of things, and know what to do, pull the trigger. The more you wait, the more you will waver and never do what you know you re supposed to do. Once you do, don’t look back. It might be scary and might not make all the sense in the world, but own your decision.
May you be led by God through the travels of this life. May you not be afraid, but embrace the decisions you have before you because they reflect God’s working in your life. May you be full of wise, Godly people that will encourage yet challenge you. And may you forever lean on God for His direction in your life.
Grace.
Ben
I think that I have made it clear to everyone that I believe Pastor Brian is one of the most gifted communicators I have heard. He seems to always deliver a heartfelt, passionate, biblically sound message. (No, I am not saying this because he’s “The Boss” or any of that other stuff staff members do!) I usually walk away thinking about something God said through him that I can apply to life. But then there was this past Sunday…
I had the pleasure of sitting in church with my in-laws and for one Sunday, during the second service, I tried to just be a church attender. Not trying to evaluate, lead, or do anything other than try to see our church through a different lens. I lost myself in worship, which Pastor Scott did a tremendous job with, and just tried to “be normal.” (Hard for me to be normal, but cut me some slack!)
Then the message came. It rocked me to the core of who I am. (Here is the link to watch it, I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT!) I was challenged to be a better follower of Christ, husband, father, and leader. I realized I had been going through the motions of life, mind you in a good way, but not one with a vision. Pastor Brian made the statement that since we know the end (talking about giving an account to God for our lives) we should work from there backwards. I do not think I will ever forget that statement. I spend time with God in the morning asking for wisdom to get through the day, order my steps, what do you want me to do, blah blah blah. But I know the answer because I know the end. Love God, love people, end of discussion. With this as the filter, things become clear. Everything we do is a reflection of how much we love God and people. This includes ourselves.
You have a vision for life. It’s that thing that keeps you up at night. The thing you would do if finances were not an issue. It’s what gets your heart beating a little faster when you talk about it. It’s there, what will you do about it? What keeps people from going after it? Here are mine…(you probably deal with the same ones…)
1. Fear – We are scared to fail. We are scared of what people will think. We are scared because we don’t know all the answers.
2. Lack of Confidence – I get this one! Why would God use me when there are so many people way more talented than me? God created you, gifted you, and has placed people in your life to teach you.
Be who God called you to be. Be the man or woman you know you can. Be the husband or wife, son or daughter, co-worker, student, whatever, but do it with the vision God has given you. But when you have the vision, MAKE NO APOLOGIES FOR IT! Not everyone is going to “get” your vision. Not everyone is going to be “on board.” People will try to change and manipulate it, but don’t sway. It’s what God has for you, and never lose sight of it…ever.
May God grip you in His grace. May His vision burn in you to the point you will have no choice but to see it fulfilled. May you be free from fear, and overflowing with confidence. May you be rock solid with your vision, never wavering or shifting. May God expand your vision, and allow you to know how much He wants you to change your world…and His.
Grace.
Ben
Crossroads. We all have them. Some if not all of us do not like them. They scare us because we think one choice is right and one is wrong. I embrace them. When I come to a crossroad, I know that it is because God has brought me to this point because He has something for me. It is a place in life where we are forced to think, not about the moment or about the past, but about the future. It is a place of life-change.
The danger with crossroads is that we rush through them to quickly. I am impatient and will make a decision quickly and decisively. (It’s the basketball coach in me!) I am able to quickly scan the situation, find the solution, and pull the trigger living with whatever happens. This is a flaw of mine when it comes to leadership sometimes. Sometimes it works, and other times it’s a disaster for the teams I lead. When I come to a crossroad, I force myself to pause and let God deal with me.
Crossroads of life need to take time. When major opportunities are in front of you, and you know they are of God, take your time. Maybe we need to see that God does not give just one option. Maybe the crossroads have two good options and God will be with us either way. We all think that God has only one plan for our life, but maybe the plan is bigger than we think. What if the plan for our life is to simply expand the Kingdom of God and either choice of the crossroad will get that accomplished? If that’s the case, then either choice will be the “Godly” choice.
Crossroads shake us up. They disrupt the comforts of normal life and force us into something else. They make us see things different, and usually when we make the choice, there is no turning back. Sounds a lot like following Christ? Maybe that is why it is called a “Cross”road…
May you embrace the choices you have today both small and large. If you are at a major crossroad in life, may you embrace the presence of God in that moment. May you see yourself in a much bigger picture than just the results of the choice. May you walk boldly in the path God has laid in front of you, and may you do so in the power of the Spirit.
Grace.
Ben
First let me say thank you to all the people that read this page of rambling and sometimes inspired thoughts. All of your emails “encouraging” me to return to the blog world is humbling. Many people have asked me why I have not blogged more and part of the reason is that I have been part of the staff blog at hydrate.tv. We have been writing as a staff, but that is coming to an end as the fall gets closer and Pastor Brian will be taking that blog back over to share his thoughts.
The other reason is that I have been going through a very introspective summer where I have been doing a lot of thinking. Thinking about life, what it holds for me, and honestly the future is a little intimidating. I have been reading and researching new ways to do ministry and what that holds for GCTV and me. God is up to something at GCTV and in me. To be honest my thoughts and feelings have been all over the place, scattered if you will. To write while my thoughts and feelings are scattered is dangerous. I have had days of great joy followed by intense anger and disappointment. (Yes, Pastors do get angry, sad, disappointed, frustrated, overwhelmed, fed up, and a host of other negative emotions. Cut me, I will bleed…) I felt it was better to collect my thoughts and process them alone and then share what I have learned. This is a much more responsible way to handle things.
So here is something I have learned through this time: The darkest of days can be the time of greatest learning. Want to know how much you really depend on God? Go through the crapper. Embrace the moments when you feel you can’t take another step, or better yet, the moment you don’t WANT to take another step. Many people will tell you that everyone goes through these days and you just have to survive it. I disagree. Don’t just survive it, learn from it. Don’t forget it, remember it, allow God to be all you feel you have. I know that God will get me through them, He has proven Himself to me more times than I can count. I still don’t want to forget the down times, I want to remember them so I can remember that God is still my savior. Your darkest days will be an intense time of learning, more than any book will teach.
May you be taught today. May you feel that dark days are times when God is still there, arms open, heart ablaze towards you, and holding you in more ways than you know. May you build an altar in your heart that will remind you of the dark times so that your joyful moments will exponentially increase. May God give your troubled heart rest.
Grace.
Ben
